Monday, May 09, 2005

I had to Google his name again didn't I - and it gets worse

I fucking had to google it, AGAIN, bcs I fucking hadn't done it to death [ha!] already, apparently. Maybe if I google it enough he'll be ressurrected. Tig Sematary, exactly what we all need. Don't know what the fuck i was thinking, don't know what i was thinking but i had never seen this link before, it's from an internship in switzerland, he was there for a few months, so i opened it:

.

hoizammen

i'll start with the usual stuff:tommorrow is my last working day in switzerland and i'll head back to israel after screwing around for a while in europe...thanks everyone for blabla bla nice time blablablabla great guys blablablablabla............

after the formalities to something more important:if either one of you/your friends/relatives wants to come to israel please don't hesitate to contact me for any help from lodging to just insider information and basic hebrew and arabic bad words:

E-mail: uzisaghi{at}hotmail{dot}com(don't use the EMPA mail any more, i'll not be able to get it as of tommorrow)

address:
uzi saghi
kibbutz horshim
45865 israel (of course)

tel: +972-3-9386### (it's my parents', they speak english and they're nice to anyone except to each other)

merry chritmas, new years eve and life

uzi

.

This was his humour, this was his humour EXACTLY, do you see how fucking brilliant he was? How fucking special? So Noorster, in reply to your question, it still doesn't seem like I'm doing so well, no. had me fooled for a while too. Do you know what absolutely, anihilatingly breaks my heart? The day after the funeral I taped his mobile and room messages, I'll always have his voice, for that I'll be forever grateful. On his mobile, do you know what he says? Do you fucking know what he says?? He says he will be going abroad for a few months, to Thailand and Nepal and India, and he finishes the message by saying, in this absolutely, heartbreakingly, anihilatingly happy voice KEF LI - What fun for me.

WHAT FUN FOR ME.

It breaks my heart so so so SO FUCKING MUCH.

---------------------

MORE: I'd never heard of Deepest Blue and hope I never will agaibn, they have a videoclip, "Shooting Star", I was zapping, saw ppeople on stage and a wave coming up behindf them, big wave, it washed over them, very very disturbing, actually felt weak butmy hands very heavy and my head swam a bit, had to put it down fopr a bit, trouble focusing and breathing very shallow, WTF, I never used to react like this to anything, hate the fucking band now, hate them w a passion, they cant help it but neither can i

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10 Comments:

At 9/5/05 00:42, Blogger Lorem ipsum said...

Electronic immortality. Energy is neither created nor destroyed.

Google away, Lioness. Reading Uzi's words, hearing his voice, are little soul fingerprints, evidence that he existed and always will. With every breath that says 'LIFE,' he remains. Never created, never destroyed.

I am just sorry that he is no longer in tangible form. Instead, he is everywhere.

 
At 9/5/05 01:58, Anonymous Danae said...

Aw, sweetie. I'm so sorry. Sending you love.

 
At 9/5/05 11:59, Blogger Ana said...

I'm sorry you found that but I'm also glad you did. I don't really know how else to say this.
Um grande abra├žo.
Ana

 
At 9/5/05 13:22, Blogger Noorster said...

oy.

 
At 9/5/05 16:19, Blogger 4 leaf clover said...

heya. i'm really sorry for your loss. he sounded like a great guy.

 
At 9/5/05 18:22, Blogger Diana said...

Very smart of you to save his voice. Very smart. Keep what you can. I wish I had done so.

 
At 9/5/05 18:48, Blogger brooksba said...

He did have a great sense of humour. It shines through in all the stories you tell about him.

Beijos.
Beth

 
At 9/5/05 19:13, Blogger CarpeDM said...

Oh, Johnny, I'm so sorry. But I agree with lorem ipsum, he does still remain and I know he's watching you.

What a horrible video. That's terrible. Especially after this tragedy that has touched so many lives.

Much love and beijos,

D

 
At 9/5/05 20:07, Blogger Lord Chimmy said...

You're lucky to have those little things of rememberance. Just as he was...near immortality granted via the power of electronic communication. Every once in a while the internet proves to be a worthwhile place.

I'm sorry you had to lose such a good person. I hope in time you can discover more pieces of the past. It might be hard to handle, but I think they're worth having around.

 
At 13/5/05 18:17, Blogger elswhere said...

When someone I loved died 13 years ago, I used to call her phone number and just listen to it ring. I did that every once in a while for a long time, months, until I got a not-in-service message.

I think it's a kind of prayer, that looking and checking.

xxoo

 

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