Tuesday, October 05, 2004

"Pigs on Platforms" (VOTE NOW!!!)

I know I NEED to do something with this sentence, the story behind it is too brilliant but I can't think of anything right now and am still reading his blog.

_ (Some time later)_

Alright. I'm still at a loss.

I'll keep the slot open for when I retrieve an email I wrote about my 1st pig castration. Although, more accurately, it should be called "Pig on Us".

Or maybe some other kibbutz animal story - I have heaps of refet* tales: when the cow in heat mounted me; when my boob got caught in the milking suction cup - twice; when it transpired I had been exercising a calf's foot for a week with a broken wrist and no wonder it hurt like hell; when suction trapped me in a pile of cow shit as high as high as my rubber boot and I had to call for help; how I became addicted to the water pressure cleaning machine; how some volunteers would not shower after milking because they "had already washed their arms so it was ok"; how milking loses its appeal after about 2 weeks and why.

Or I could talk about some really scary volunteers I met.

You lot, I'm tired of all this freedom, YOU GET TO CHOSE! Regulars, get on with it. Lurkers, de-lurk. Friends - oh right, they CAN'T BE BOTHERED about my blog (except my faithful G., as melhoras!). I'm parcial to the dung suction one for sheer surrealness value and because I barely avoided falling face down into all that cow glory but don't let that influence you. VOTE NOW!

* The refet is the place where cows are housed and milked - someone put me out of my misery because I can't remember the word in English and it's KILLING ME!!!

- WHY DOESN'T ANYONE LOVE KANT? Or do I suck at explaining it that badly? Bah. -


At 5/10/04 07:34, Blogger M said...

golly, pig castration vs. cow shit. kind of like voting for president. I pick pig.

At 5/10/04 11:09, Blogger Beleobus said...

Kant?? Did you say Imannuel Kant...?

Love his work.

Although they do say he was a real Piss Ant... :-)

Heidegger was a boozy begger who could think you under the table... etc.

But I love Kant.

At 5/10/04 13:04, Blogger Lala said...

and Rene DesCartes was a druken fart, I drink therefore I am.

I'd like to hear about the scary volunteers please.

At 5/10/04 19:27, Blogger Dale said...

Ah, you must be relatively new at this blogging business. There are three comment-generation principles you need to know:

1) The very best thing you post in any given month will receive no comments whatsoever (this principle is sometimes superceded by 3), below)

2) Comments are generated not according to the intrinsic interest of the post, but according to how nicely they segue into something the commenter has always wanted to say

3) Posts with strong sexual content always elicit comments.

(...Personally, I vote for the broken wrist.)

At 5/10/04 22:29, Blogger squarepeg said...

Igor [slavering]: I vote for the addictive water pressure machine, hoping it will relate to (3) above. [snort] [mooooo] [hiccup]

p.s. Is refet the dairy, or maybe the cowshed?

At 6/10/04 15:12, Blogger The Lioness said...

Well, thanks you for voting! My work was not made easier bcs NO ONE voted for the same one so I'll see what takes my fancy inspiration-wise. But I see even M crawled out of the woodwork - Hi M! Dale, :DDDD! That sounds absolutely right! As for pig castration, I will have to find a way to find someone who can take out the hard disk from my dead computer and retrieve my old files. It may take a long while.

Posts with sexual content, it will, OF COURSE, have to re volunteers - and a trip to Mitzpeh Ramon comes to mind... Oh, and that other time that ended with a post-coital beer bottles' indoor flight... And the roommate who'd insist upon bonking in OUR shower... And - you see what I mean.

Squarepeg, you're one sick person! :D And yes, tnx, refet is both dairy and cowshed. At least I think so.

I'll get started. Dale, I think you win (I'll throw in some water pressure for S.)

At 6/10/04 22:51, Blogger D said...

Kant means "Lace" in Dutch. Wasn't he a philospher, like Burt Bacharach?
But seriously, HANDS OFF the volunteers. I did enough banana-schlepping and dade-munching to last me forever. Although the last time doesn't count, I was an Ulpani then... But I still managed to have sex mostly with foreign girls, and so I will never forget Anat. Beautiful but out of reach except for serious guys. And I was anything but back then.
BTW, "refet", doesn't that mean "stable" or "barn"?

At 9/10/04 17:28, Blogger Noorster said...

If it's not too late I'd like to vote for the 'boob caught in the milking suction cup'-story, for possible sexual content eliciting comments.

At 10/10/04 06:44, Blogger Jackson said...

Kant would be great and all but...

His theory is full of paradoxaciousness. Theory: (A.K.A. Categorical Imperative)Don't do it unless you would be ok with everyone else doing it. In other words, don't lie, steal, cheat. Flaw: The thief example, which is well known, basically exploits the flaw in full: A thief requests the location of a person whom you know, so that they may maim him/her, or potentially kill him/her. If you do not reply, the murderer will kill you. Under Kantian philosophy, you cannot lie; because that would justify everyone lying, and that if everyone lied, this world would be unstable balance of truths and lies.

Which, guess what? It is.

The moral of the story? Kantian philosophy is ideal, but unattainable.

At 11/10/04 22:31, Blogger The Lioness said...

Jared, i quite agree, but I don't even care whether it's paradoxical. I don't really fancy analysing theories because I'm so terrible at it, and very often do not even notice paradoxes, I just intuitively take from them what feels right to me and leave the battling for more logical, dissecting minds. It being mostly unattainable doesn't detract from - enter theme for "The Bold and the Beautiful" or something equally nauseating - the beauty of the vision. I find his Kingdom of Ends very touching. And maybe we cannot do it all the time but at times we do and, as one of our poets says, "we cannot change the world but we can change the world around us" (Casimiro de Brito).


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