Haval al ha-dema'ot

I'm back in Lisbon. Am relieved I'm not in the kibbutz anymore, him everywhere i turn to. Kept getting up in the evenings to go back to the room, never mind that there is no room, just kept getting up. Could not believe i was there. cannot believe i'm here, doesn't help either. Very grateful i went, very very grateful. so good to be able to hug Lila, she and her family are always a haven. feels like i was away for a lifetime. saying goodbye to his family was horrendous. His mum told me i'll always have a home w them, such a terrible thing to say now. there may be many rooms in my father's house but they're all empty, they're all empty. Lila and i have taken the mad laughter road without looking back. Started w emails, death jokes. Now it could be anything. Had a nightmare and woke up at 4 am, couldn't fall back to sleep? Courtesy of Uzi Saghi. Which makes for a good acronym, CUS, which in hebrew is pronounced Koos, which actually means something really vulgar in arabic, which is actually part of an arabic curse israelis use a lot, cus emek, and which he was very fond of especially when he stubbed his toe and the likes. So now CUS is randomly applied to Everything That Is Wrong, which right now is basically everything. We used to do a lot of birdwatching, he had the most amazing eye for finding all sorts of critters. I'd forgotten how elusive the birds were at times but it all came rushing back with lorry strength when Lila and I were discussing something, the funeral maybe, most probably, and she said Birds don't come easy and my coke went neatly through my nose. She used to sing it to me when our birdwatching went poorly to the tune of Words don't come easy. So BDCE can be used for anything, it's rather philosophical. I showed Z. my blog and he read Squarepeg's comment abt how i must be a lifeline to them. I said it was actually the other way round, he said we are all each other's lifelines (and my god, when did he become this wise, he's my Tig's little brother). but before that he'd asked what a lifeline was bcs he didn't know the word and i said "Well, say you're on a boat and someone's drown-" and I froze, looked at him very seriously, he looked at me very seriously, i said Oops, i said DROWNING! and we started laughing hysterically and high-fiveing each other. It warranted it didn't it. Hysteria is always just a thought away. [hearbreak #347: Uzi used to spell his last name without an H and i told him in some countries - like here - the G would cause it to be pronounced Sajee, so he went with Saghi from then on. Z., his brother, was giving me his email so we could chat on MSN and I noticed he spells it wtih an H as well. I said Oh, you spell it SagHi? Funny that, and he said No, he told me to and why. It lives on.] Lila says Z. collects such treasures. There is an expression in hebrew that means something like "too bad/bad luck is to be the one who is dead". Someone was in his parents' house talking and said "haval" (too bad, bad luck) [Squarepeg has corrected my translation in the comments. I still think that, despite its literal translation, it should be translated into English as "shame abt something-something" bcs that's the closest approximation in actual meaning.] and someone else started using the expression I mentioned, stopping abruptly after "haval al" when he realised what he was abt to say. Lila says Z. turned his head so he could look at her and smirked. OOPS. When we were walking back from the f. we were discussing how quick it must have been. As far as it could be reconstructed bcs the hotel manager's son survived, Aya was on the beach and Uzi was in the room. He had a stomach ache (he ALWAYS had a stomach ache, he ate terribly and drank too much milk) and was still sleeping. Sleep he could do as well, any time, anywhere, no problem. Aya escaped the first wave but not the second one, a wall fell on her. Uzi was unblemished - for a corpse, that is - apart from a bruise on his thigh. They were found very far away from each other. So knowing him, if he'd as much as had a few seconds warning, he'd have fought like hell. Seems he didn't so we think he sort of woke up dead, as in Why the wings? This is another winning sentence, to be followed immediately by Oops, don't say wings. listening to the radion ensures we will not have a moment of quiet bcs songs are all made of very funny, well-timed words, it turns out. another winner is Oh haven't the Jewish people suffered enough, that will set us off immediately as well. I emailed Lila yesterday to tell her I'd arrived safely [don't say "safely"] and told her I was feeling sorry for my different-faith acquaintance, who's here visiting due to some karmic misfiring or something bcs I really don't know what to do with myself at times nowadays and sometimes it'd be much better if I were alone. And she emails back it's alright, them people have not suffered enough just yet, so i think thi is a good opportunity for that.

And the Jewish people really have NOT suffered enough yet bcs the sound of an alarmingly big amount of glass shattering just came in from the kitchen and upon examination, it would seem the different faither, God bless all minorities, has effectively blown up the stove lid and glass is littering the kitchen floor and the hallway. No humans and other animals were harmed [don't say "harmed"].