How to diagnose a full moon- again

1- Decide to live more healthily and do not drink Coke at all. Forget to drink green tea instead. Get coke when it's too late already for you not to have a migraine. Spend the day in the throes of said migraine for no other reason than your having been amazingly a tad stupid. YET AGAIN.

2 - Crawl into bed in the evening wondering how on earth you'll make it alive to your father's surprise party tomorrow, w relatives you haven't seen in many a year. Force yourself to read your bones book. MANDIBLE: The mandible has one body, two rami. It forms a single bone in the Horse and the Pig and is not fused in other species. Etc.

3 - Crawl out of bed at top speed when your mother rings you to ask that you pick them up at top speed to drive them to the hospital bcs your father is having that pain again [right side, abdominal/thoracic. Father just tested positive for – surprise! – Helicobacter pylori and has had chronic gastritis for decades now]. Manage to not have an accident despite the lethal combo migraine/flickering, moving lights. Be kicked out of hospital by your mother after a couple of hours bcs it will take forever and father is resting wile they wait for the blood tests results and mother has also occupied an armchair and is ready to sleep some and she will only worry more if you’re there and you’re looking awfully skinny and pale anyway and please try to avoid the sun because those brown spots on your face [known everywhere else as "freckles"] are getting bigger and bigger. You exit the hospital shortly before midnight and are very careful to avoid the sun, as per mother. Mother will keep you posted. Father is diagnosed with – surprise! – acute gastritis at 4 am and is given prescriptions galore and sent home.

4 - Family are warned that they are not to come after all. Father lying on the sofa, slighty feverish, and utterly miserable and sweaty bcs he wrapped himself in a bathrobe and covered himself with a sheet and mother cannot convince him to unwrap bcs, well, can’t she see he is dying [implicit] and she is is wife and needs to take care of him [verbatim]. [Adorable, yes? Mother thinks so as well despite father being a PITA when ill, remotely ill or contemplating being ill.] Mother wonders what she is to do with food for 11 people but Good God no, don’t come round to help, it’d make it worse! Decide you’re too generous a person to take offence.

5 - Realise your moribund computer has completed its dying overnight and is now lying belly up on the table, bloated and pong-y. Bcs it wasn’t full moon yet, you were successful in saving mostly everything a few days ago. Get ready to drive it to the shop, wonder when you will see it again.

6 - Get ready to spend the afternoon in the Archaeology Museum handling old, smelly and VERY BRITTLE bones of animals long gone.

Shabbat shalom. Hopefully.